just me-yanlin

太久

2012-02-10T23:04:00.003+08:00

It's really too long. Too long.

Whenever I raised this question to 269, they always gave the this answer:

It's either you take it or leave it.

What can I do like seriously? Everyday, the same routine goes over and over again... I am tired and disappointed. Everyday I've been looking forward to some "miracle" happen. But it had always fail me. I seriously have no idea what am I suppose to do now.

It seems that I deserve a scolding by my friends around whenever I raided this question... Sigh.

Keep telling myself that I should stop being to 在意 about this problem which I can't help it at all!But I can't...

Oh well, waiting for March to see how it goes. Guess I am still going to carry on with my plan.

Oh btw, XY and YX knows my password for my phone like OMG only... XD

First post of the year!

2012-01-30T19:09:00.002+08:00

First post of the year after so long... Feeling a bit weird. Gonna use this as a way for me to practice my English. English is getting worse and worse.

Life of a Sec 4 kid.... Totally suck to the max. I hate it. Tons and tons of homework, tons and tons of CCA stuff. But glad that CCA is ending soon. I want to focus on my studies!

This Saturday and Friday will be having a full pure paper. If I failed this paper = GG = bye pure = bye JC = Hi Poly = Omg which course should I take = Okay I will choose this then regret.

Wts right?

Fine.

漂流瓶

2011-12-05T22:39:00.001+08:00

Love 把心扔到海里
刻上爱的字迹
时光带我去有你的地方
漂流着一千年都过了我在海里走
有一种见不到你就不回去的念头
旋涡中听见耳边的风微微战抖
沧海桑田黑夜白昼
我随着时间的方向一圈圈打着转
你会不会找到我将要在哪里靠岸
如果有一天撞上一个小缺口
我怕沉入海底

2011-12-04T20:55:00.002+08:00

有太多，太多的事壓抑在心底。這些是非筆墨所能寫出來的。

就像一把刀插在心上。

阿甄啊~~

2011-12-03T23:57:00.002+08:00

本人今天小离题了一下。把2012的New Year wish 写成2011 的wish... XD

今天很成功！希望明天也一样！

新不了情

2011-12-03T00:45:00.002+08:00

“回憶過去痛苦的相思忘不了爲何你還來撥動我心跳”

回憶

2011-12-02T15:06:00.005+08:00

這一個月裏和自己約定好，每天必須來post 以下，抒發心情。

昨天到海邊。可以算是散散心吧，因爲心裏又有一大堆事在心裏了。

人啊可不可以不要這麽煩呢？好像不可以噢。。。

我好崇拜紫薇，好想和她一樣，琴棋書畫都行。好想和小燕子一樣，瀟灑，好像瘋人一樣，快快樂樂的活！

好羡慕《十全十美》，好像擁有他們那種友情。同甘共苦。

其實這些，我好像以前都有噢。。。

可惜啊，可惜。。。這些只能回憶。

-----------------------------------------------------------

This is joke. Just went to Chris's blog and found out so many things! :D

Meng has really change a lot! Wow. Gorgeous! Chris too....

Wonder if the 5 of them still remember each other...

不能。。。

2011-12-01T13:10:00.006+08:00

好吧，我承認，現在很多事不能像以前一樣了。。。

昨天晚上手上拿著手機，很自然的到了信箱的那一篇。看了上個月和前幾個月所有的訊息。看著看著，心就有點痠。

有些東西真的回不了從前的。

我永遠都會記住 Jay 所講的一句話。

“友情就像一條綫。你把一條好好的綫剪短又把它辦起來，不管怎麽樣中間還是會有一個結。那個結還是在那。”

如果有人能把那個結弄掉，我真的很佩服他/她。

12月了。

再過30天就是2012了。新的一年又要開始了。。。

再過39天，她就要來了。

再過不久，女神又要大駕光臨來SG了。

再過不久，Os 就要來了。

時間真得好快。還有很多事是我不能預料到的。希望明年所發生的事會是好的。我不想再有什麽 “友情之災” 的事發生。所有一切不好的事請你們通通消失！！！

12月了。

。。。

2011-11-30T16:21:00.007+08:00

其實，對於某些事有什麽發展，什麽結果，我真的並不在乎。我在乎的是，在我身邊的人能不能感受到人與人之間彼此的距離？能不能感受到當下的他或她其實是不開心的？我身邊的人能不能敏感一些？

我只能說，我身邊的人還不夠敏感。尤其是對於某些事物。

剛剛去看了喬恩的blog。我只能說，我的心真的平靜下來了許多。我，又再次想了一些事情。

變了這個話題又再次浮現在我腦海裏。其實啊，活在這世上有十五年之久的我還不得不承認，我現在真的一直在變，而且變得超快。

人活在當下怎麽可能不變？但是最怕的是他或她可能變得更加恐怖。這或許是你能預料到的，也或許是你不能預料到的。有時，最讓人傷心的是看到最愛的變了，而且變得連你的心都告訴你 “這真的是我認識的你嗎？” 的時候，這是極度恐怖又傷心的。

最近我又不得不承認，身邊的友人也逐漸不斷的在變。

人都是會變的，這是我們必須去接受的事實。

剛在巴士上想念了某人。我現在真的真的好想抱住她然後痛哭一場。實在憋得太久了。

想到了去年某一天的時被她抱住讓后把心裏所有的不開心通通哭出來，那時我心裏真的束縛了許多。

可是現在不能再這樣了。我整整憋了一年，心裏超不舒服的。

雖然這一路上有不同的人讓我訴苦，但是這些人都比不過她那一番真的了解我的心。

真的好像回到從前。

-------------------------------------------------------

我變了，

這是我害怕的地方，

因為似乎再不能用我所認知的去看待我所認知的一切了。

因為那些我所認知的，總是一一打壓著我。

再近一步，就有痛苦。

而退一步，我無法對自己交代清楚。

我想

我變了，我想我不再那樣了。。。

Credit: http://www.realjoechen.com/

\m/

2011-11-29T22:59:00.002+08:00

Watched MAMA just now. This made me thought of those days when Hebe came to SG and I am like a crazy Siao-ing about her! Super nice!

Just know that Hebe will be coming to SG next year again!! OMG! Die. Won't be able to go to her concert... I mean SOLO concert for sure.

T.T Sian diao.

Alright, nvm will see how things goes on next year. Shall start revising tmr since Hebe's time is over! Super looking forward to Christmas and a outing soon with Mily and outing soon with beloved 269! XD

Next year 2012, busy and crazy year, but I'm still afraid of 2012.

怎麼辦

2011-11-20T17:05:00.000+08:00

好快，一年要過去了。

現在心情真的很。。。 low. 就連我自己都不知道為什麼會這樣。

還記得兩天前到K box 唱歌的那個時候。當她唱《還是要幸福》時，我變得超沉默。因為腦海裡一直浮現那些畫面，差點噴淚。但還好，我忍住了。

想了好多。但是我看還是別在這裡說出吧。

是時候該學會如何不把所有事情都說出來。學會憋住。
因為有時候說太多，就算了解你的人也不會聽進去。

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Last day

2011-11-20T16:35:00.003+08:00

Jaylin was right. My world doesn't revolve around her. If I continue the way I am now, it will be seen as I am living for her only.

XY and the others were back from their camp. Great and happy to hear that. I can't go out today because if I do, I might not be able to go for Hebe's autograph session although I did said that I don't want to. Okay, I'm weird.

Was fuming mad because of something yesterday. See through something through yesterday's incident. Now I really know who are the ones that will really be with me.

Thanks to them.

For now, I won't say anything much. I've been an idiot throughout the whole session. I am stupid.

:/

2011-11-17T19:52:00.002+08:00

Evening.

Feel so down after talking to JY while walking back from school. Jon was like walking in front of us and didn't even bother to reply us when we called him. What's wrong with people now a days? -.- Walao jidan right? Really very tired sia.

And for now, don't really feel like going to Hebe's autograph session already. Like seriously. I. Don't. Feel. Like. Going.

Feel like deleting everything. I really don't understand why people tend to forget what they've said so easily? They have STM is it? Wts. Then why I am the one that has good memories and remembered everything they've said? WTH RIGHT?

I should become STM also right? Really sick and tired.

I should really have my life back and become myself again. It has been 3 months already and this kind of shit haven't even settle. Omg... 269, where are all of you? I want my happy life back!!!

FML. :/

This is not the first day already.

Stop.

2011-11-17T01:07:00.004+08:00

I should really stop tweeting lah. Omg, PYL, What the fuck are you doing? ._.

Sometimes I just can't stand myself for being so.... Jidan

Ya, sometimes I am like a shit too. So when I can I stop this rubbish?

Sian...

Can't sleep like now. Wth?

And

I haven't finish my story...

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Fuck myself. ._. Really. FML

:/

2011-11-17T00:36:00.005+08:00

Have some weird thoughts yesterday.

But I think this thoughts will hardly come true. I am still very puzzled. Very very...

The weird thoughts:

1) Go outside the F1 pit and wait for her, then go home together on the 26th

2) Calling out Shu Hui for Hebe's 簽唱會 + HK and her and go together although I won't have the what stupid priority. Like wts :/

3) Talk to her later in the day if she is going to school/lunch if she can have lunch

But all these weird thoughts will hardly come true :/ Really and no joke.

Currently still waiting for something.

LJY disappoint me too. :/ Why I call you = this matter?

Like... Omg. Why? I don't understand. Really don't.

Sian... 知己is like that de meh? Wth... ._.

Disappointment everywhere. :/

Good or not?

2011-11-16T20:17:00.002+08:00

Totally sian diao like just now.

Decided to 退出工委活動 and I like sms-ed the in-charge like 2 hour ago and SHE IS NOT REPLYING ME!!! Omg... I am afraid she is like angry so something. How can a person didn't check her phone for like 2 hours? ._.

Some more, just know that those who bought Sundown tickets will have the priority to queue for Hebe's autograph. Like wow. So this is the "報應" for not getting sundown tickets? ._. Totally sian diao can?

Sian....

哎呀

2011-11-15T19:34:00.005+08:00

Finally, a normal post I guess.

Love this song by Vanness Wu - 哎呀. 安以軒客串演出!!! WOOT! They are so sweet in the MV! Back to 光稀 and 幕橙 days.... :D

安以軒 rocks yo~~ The melody is nice too! 輕飆飆的感覺。聼了很舒服。

Today was quite okay. Went back to school and crapping with JY and Nai nai. Have lunch with usual group and went off.

I really hope this kind of mood will last like forever, but I doubt so. Keep telling myself not to think too much, but.... I am still thinking.

Dateline gonna be up,

Are you ready?

我們

2011-11-15T00:57:00.001+08:00

聼得出，你唱到要哭了。

我們。

--------------------------------------------

第三章

2011-11-15T00:26:00.003+08:00

第三章: 無聲的呐喊

小章背著書包來到大海前。突然，天空變得非常灰暗，海水波濤洶湧的打上岸邊。小章擡頭一看，老天竟在那兒。

“爲什麽要如此殘忍？” 小章問道。

“什麽如此殘忍？你再説什麽？這還不是你自己造成的，不是嗎？如果你相信，其實人也能掌控自己的命運。你可以選擇不離開，可是你離開了。你可以選擇繼續作非常，非常要好的朋友，但是你選擇了一個不。你看，我說的是不是有道理呢？你問問自己，我幾時對你殘忍過了？我心地善良的很！” 老天答道。

小章愣在那兒。然後看著大海。淚不由自主地從臉上划了下來。小章便蹲下去，哭了。

“終于找到你了！” 小穎道。“你怎麽了？”

小穎把小章扶了起來。

小穎告訴小章

“你們啊。。。其實，機會是要自己去製造的。如果你明白我的意思，你就去吧！”

小章似乎明白小穎所說的話，站了起來，和小穎回家去。

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

第二章

2011-11-14T23:41:00.004+08:00

第二章: 漸漸地

不知爲何，很快的，一轉眼，新的一年又開始了！小章和往常一樣，開開心心的和小魚一起玩樂。在這期間，小章認識了一位非常要好的朋友- 小穎。小穎是個超搞笑的一位女孩。雖然她傻乎乎的，人人都叫她 RETARD! 可是，她的思想卻很不一樣。被感情傷到了，人也漸漸成熟了。而小魚還是一樣和小婷作好朋友。倆人分別在不同的班，但然認識的人也不一樣。但是感情還是和往常一樣。

某天，老馮很高興得告訴全班

“各為親愛的同學們！我們將在六月到上海去！有興趣的同學來和老馮報名吧！”

那時想出國想到風的她們當然就去報名了啊！

上海好好玩！超級無敵的美！

但是，沒想到一去上海就好像180度的轉變。轉變真的好大。

小章，忽然之間，慢慢的離開小魚。

小魚很疑惑，也很傷心。不知道爲何小章要離開她。日哭夜哭。哭到大海的水都快淹過正常海水綫的水平。但是她還是一直哭，一哭。。。

而小章呢？小章背著書包，到了很遠，很遠的地方。。。

這其中的原因。。。

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

第一章

2011-11-14T21:28:00.004+08:00

第一章: 開始

很久很久以前，在這世上有兩位很奇特的人。章魚燒，糖醋魚。她們非常，非常，特別要好。

她們有共同的嗜好，共同的性格。所以可以説是天注定要相遇的。

小章想都沒想到，原來有人和她一樣喜歡 CQE!! 從她十嵗開始，身邊的朋友都沒有一個人和她喜歡一樣的偶像。現在沒想到身邊有一個和她一樣的人讓她感到無比的吃驚！

從此，她們就真的非常要好。好到可以什麽都可以說，什麽都可以做。小章就在那一年裏做了很多從來沒有做過的事，去了很多從來沒有去過的地方。而這些事物都是小魚帶她去的。小章在那一年裏過得真的很開心，很開心。當中認識了很多朋友。

小章做過最瘋狂的是就是- 去金曲獎看阿碧。

從此她們倆就喜歡上了阿碧。

別誤會！阿碧不是什麽帥哥！阿碧是亞洲女子天團ABC 的成員！！

天啊！從此以後，她們就開始瘋狂追阿碧。

讓小章最難忘的就是那一天，一月十五日一起去聼阿碧音樂會的時候。

超難忘的！

小章真的，真的，真的很開心！

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

冰箱

2011-11-11T22:23:00.003+08:00

把大象放进冰箱有几个步骤
把河马放进冰箱有几个步骤
把回忆放进冰箱会不会寂寞
把爱情放进冰箱已经到了时候

让眼泪一次流够要几个枕头
让明天不再难过要多少纸鹤
让热情变成冷漠算不算罪过
让爱情退冰多久
才可以化为乌有
从今以后再没有人那样逗我
从今以后就要分手
从今以后冰箱不必再放啤酒
从今以后别在门口等我

让眼泪一次流够要几个枕头
让明天不再难过要多少纸鹤
让热情变成冷漠算不算罪过
让热情退冰多久
才可以化为乌有
从今以后再不需要别人哄我
从今以后就算分手
从今以后日记再也不用上锁
从今以后甚至不是朋友
苹果给你柠檬给我
可乐给你咖啡给我
自由给你真心给我
你的给你我的你不能带走
从今以后再没有人那样逗我
从今以后就要分手
从今以后冰箱不必再放啤酒
从今以后别在门口等我
从今以后别在门口等我

-----------------------------------------------------

這兒歌詞實在太形容我現在的心情。本來今天的 SIO 是要開心一整天，可是我做不到。今天在回返的路上，我又Emo了。

不知爲什麽，你每次會忘記我說過的話。你似乎不相信我講的東西。而我呢？我卻相信你說的每一句話。你給的承諾我都記得，但是爲什麽你會忘記我講過的話？

你給我的又是失望。._.

今天和Xue Ying 聊了還算蠻多的。聊了最近鉄四角出現的問題。看吧，就連鉄四角也出現了問題。真的很心酸。有時候真的很想放棄，不想每天跟著人家的腳步走。我走累了，可不可以人別人跟著我？

爲什麽人要面對這麽多問題呢？如果能自自自在在的活這不是很好嗎？我不喜歡這樣的生活，真的不喜歡。一個問題過了又是另一個。這種沒完沒了的日子真的很累。._.

让眼泪一次流够要几个枕头
让明天不再难过要多少纸鹤

:\

2011-11-10T23:02:00.002+08:00

Feeling so down now.... Sudden down. No idea why am I feeling this way.....

Had Chinese Os today. The paper is like... omg it gives me a suck feeling.

The "LOVE" Chocolate.... Do you still remember?

怎么会哭

2011-11-05T01:10:00.005+08:00

终于不再问了你想要什么
终于不再迁就你提的每个要求

终于不再执着当你只求离开我
我决定让你走
不要你跟着我受折磨呜~呜~

怎么会哭我怎么会哭
我以为我能撑得住
能承受失去你的孤独

怎么会哭我怎么会哭
明明我微笑着说出
只要你能过得幸福我就很满足
再用不着承诺你的明天没有我
再用不着担忧
没办法陪伴你会寂寞呜~呜~

怎么会哭我怎么会哭
我以为我能撑得住
能承受失去你的虚无

怎么会哭我怎么会哭
难道我还不够知足
还不舍从前的相处

我不能哭我怎么能哭
就不要你看我无助
让你觉得爱我是错误

怎么能哭有什么好哭
只要你能过的幸福
就算再苦我也彷佛
得到了祝福

我只能告诉我自己，

我不能哭。

“糖醋鱼一直在你的身边，但只能默默地陪着你”

章鱼少一直在你的身边，但只能默默地看着你的背影离去。

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

灰

2011-11-05T00:14:00.004+08:00

傻吗？

原来做了这么多最后还是空。真的很。。。

我也有些不明白，为什么会变常这样呢？本来我还有点希望的，可是现在好像又变暗了。

我现在是生气，不甘心加上伤心。

你很为难，那我呢？难道你忘了我在信中写了些什么吗？我并没有忘记你在信中写了些什么。真的很无奈。

就是因为我们对彼此坦白，所以事情还没解决。很无奈。

真的。。。回不了从前了吗？

悲。

Back?

2011-11-02T21:33:00.002+08:00

Are we back to the same point? I wondered.

After that 2 months or so, we ate on the same table together for yesterday... Like finally.... Do all sorts of stupid things to her... That was what I will do in the past.

Are we back to normal? Or there's still a gap between us....

I was like...

Today walked back together with her from PP. Then it was like... So quite all the way until we met Haslam and his group.

WOW! This wasn't the way we used to be...

I don't like this.

I want a hug... like now.

WTH!

2011-10-19T00:58:00.002+08:00

I don't need space. Why do I need such a big space for? For me to dream? To sleep? I don't need a SPACE! What I need is a.... Sigh...

You think JY is that free? She is going to sit beside me 24/7 listening to me crying, talking about my craps to her. So you think she don't have her own problem... Great. So you think she can understand me for everything?

WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?? WHAT THE HELL?!

Ya right. Ya right. I deserve a slap lah har. I deserve that. Now, crying to who is = zero.

What the hell. I should really go jump into the sea just now right? I am now like.... what the hell...

你，到现在，还不知道吗？为什么？都过了几个月了。。。为什么！！！我真的很无奈。某人曾经告诉我，我相信你们会复合的。。。我看现在是凶多吉少。。。

我真的不明白。。。I feel so screw now... Jidan. F myself.

无奈

2011-10-19T00:43:00.003+08:00

这是一个关于小章和老天的故事。

我望着天空问老天: 为何要如此残忍？

老天笑着说: 因为你太幸福了啊！太多朋友对你太好了。

我哭着道: 那为什么是她？

老天又笑着说: 因为她是你最亲的啊。失去才懂痛嘛。我给了你机会，你不珍惜，那我就拿走咯。

我望着老天，心里痛着

再过一会儿。。。

望着天空，看着大海。老天看着我，对我说: 好啦，别哭了。我也很无助耶。。。我望着老天，问道: 那我宁愿什么都不要。我只要回小鱼。老天没说什么，只用一个微笑来回应。我的心又再次隐隐作痛。仿佛，下一秒就停止。

无奈的小章就只好一直哭，一直哭。。。

我的心真的受伤了

2011-10-17T19:26:00.002+08:00

今天，差点儿在考试时喷泪。

写了一个关于友情的作文。开头我是这么写的“有人说，友情好比一条线。如果你会好好的呵护它，保护它，它就会像钢铁般一样坚固。若你不会，就算剪刀一切，风一吹，它都会断。而这，要看谁先放弃。”

而这句话，是我看着她，边看边写的。

Song part 2

2011-09-23T23:04:00.007+08:00

Songs part 1

2011-09-23T22:18:00.003+08:00

Not going to say much. Songs are just another way to fill my dairy.

-

2011-09-17T19:33:00.004+08:00

就算我現在轉身就算我找到替身
都不能再反敗為勝再偽裝超人
就算我眼角移植就算我換心手術
都不能再自欺欺人再演爛好人

全世界一起比賽誰比誰多一點自尊
自尊複製靈魂複製標本複製假的分身

寂寞的人複製更寂寞的人們
沒有人能逞英雄受得了愛的虛榮
各自尋找防空洞只是動物的本能衝動

寂寞的我複製更寂寞的我們
我以為愛只要哄以為你就只要寵
我自以為的寬容與你想做的夢不相容

是你把晶片植入然後把記憶抽出
你狠狠關掉全螢幕拔掉心電圖
空空的空心灰塵空飄在天空之城
找不到同一國的人人類的體溫

全世界一起比賽誰比誰多一點自尊
自尊複製靈魂複製標本複製假的分身

寂寞的人複製更寂寞的人們
沒有人能逞英雄受得了愛的虛榮
各自尋找防空洞只是動物的本能衝動

寂寞的我複製更寂寞的我們
我以為愛只要哄以為你就只要寵
我自以為的寬容與你想做的夢不相容

寂寞的人複製更寂寞的人們
沒有人能逞英雄受得了愛的虛榮
各自尋找防空洞只是動物的本能衝動

寂寞的我複製更寂寞的我們
我以為愛只要哄以為你就是要寵
我自以為的寬容與你想做的夢~不相容

Thank you and Goodbye.

2011-09-17T18:32:00.006+08:00

S.H.E 10th anniversary video. Haha.. It's damn funny. Especially near to 5.22

Hebe: 朋友，朋友，都已不够来形容。。。

(Ella still in Laland...) Ella: 干吗？

Selina: 她忘词了啦！！

Ella: 你现在出了个人专辑就忘了我们专辑的歌词！现在赶快下载xxxx歌词给她

Selina: 她说，朋友，朋友都已不够来形容。她以为。。她以为我是周华建。。。

ROFL!!! This is damn funny!!!

But I know this laughter is only for a while only.

Just yesterday, I did something that was real painful for me. It's really damn pain. I bet no one will know how I felt.

"I feel like deleting you, cuz I can't stop thinking...."

Through this sentence, my reaction was What the Hell? I stone in front of my computer for a few moment. I went to my follower page. Look at her name again. A lot of things went through my mind at that moment. With just 2 clicks, I ended everything. After all the process. I lean back, my heart felt so pain like ever before. Ever.

I really have got nothing to say, I swear. Losing one friend is like losing your husband or whatever. And I know very well, all this cause by myself.

I once thought that if she have not asked that question on 8/8, I think all this will not happened.

But for now, is all too late.

Still, I thank you for what you gave me in the past. I have a lot fun when I am with you. All the fun, crying, laughing, screaming for Hebe....

Maybe... Just maybe, we might not go back to the past again... We might not be as close as the photo below...

It's a scar and a pain in my life.

Jolene Teo JX

Best of Best of PYL Friend ever. 糖醋鱼

16/09/11

你总是这样说我
像一颗不容易溶化的糖果
带我见你的朋友
又很得意埋怨我沉默
你追问我的行踪
你在乎我的举动
哄得我泪眼迷蒙
做些事情让我被感动
望着你突然一阵心痛
一次又一次任那感情放纵
你的脆弱让我走不开
你的依赖所以我存在
想着你还是想到心痛
期待我做的将来你都会懂
有一天真如果有一天
但愿我还在你记忆中

永远的，永远的。。。

A day after!

2011-09-15T22:17:00.003+08:00

Hey people!

Once again thanks for all the wishes! I am touched with today and yesterday! :D I have really wonderful friends around that's what I can conclude. :D

With all this I shall be a new self again. I will not be leaving in the past and I shall MOVE ON!! Not looking back.

Some songs that I want to share with you guys today and so I will not write much. Shall continue tmr!

Thanks to LSE, CYZ, LXY, Mildred, Rachel, LJY, YX, you and a lot of others!

:D

2011-09-03T00:29:00.003+08:00

Happy Belated! I am still living in 31/08

Love this video. Thanks to XY and others that place a part in this video. :D

It's like 7 months since you went back to Korea. Aww. really miss you. Hope you will do well in your studies for you next examination.

Today is the release of Hebe's 2nd album- My Love :) This album can only listen but can't sing.

Joke!

Don't flunk your study with Hebe man.

Currently the song that I like the most 《要说什么》《还是要幸福》

Have you grab your love? If not grab it NOW!

My Love, another album that you wouldn't miss...

Happy Birthday! :D

2011-08-31T00:03:00.002+08:00

Happy Birthday to our Dear So Eui :D Happy Birthday yo!

Aww... This bring backs the memories of last year's Birthday.... Nooo!!!!

Hope you are happy today :D

It's 1am in Korea now... haha...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY! :D

Alive

2011-08-24T23:00:00.002+08:00

Hi people, I am alive. Happy? Ya.

Feeling down at this moment because I have no idea how to give my mum to sign my paper with that idiot beside. WTH. Can someone just save me?

I felt so fail today. 3 test with such a lol results that I don't and didn't expect myself to have it. I don't understand myself that why others can understand such a simple concept but I can't. I don't understand, simply don't.

JF and XY and simply get a 31 and 27 but why must I get this kind of marks? Even if I did study I still get this kind of marks? LOL? Joke? God, are you trying to play with me or what?

Everything that ahma said was right lah. Jidan. I am speechless whenever she open's her mouth. Omg...

How? How am I going to survive through end of year? ._. So what if I get a 70/100 for EOY? It won't pull me up to A or B4. WTH! I DON'T WANT TO DROP TO SUB SCIENCE! Omg... I know with the help of LJY, it won't help much. It's all too late lah. EOY is just like how many months away? I've got so many to catch up. WTH!

Just let me die lah then I don't have to worry so much. I am really very tired to care about everything already. Kao.

I told JY or someone while we walk back don't know from where to classroom:

她失踪了。找不回来。她失踪在很大很大的森林里，我找不到她。回不了过去。谁都无法找到她。

Omg. LSE! WHERE ARE YOU? I lost one friend already.

6 more days...

Well... :D

2011-08-22T00:07:00.002+08:00

Nobody will disagree with me that yesterday was such a fun day!

This is my first time having such a wonderful time with my friends this year. No doubt. How I wish the time could stop at yesterday.

Happy Belated to XY, Happy Birthday to Stan.

Today marks the start of the sells for the Sundown's tickets. Not going for sure because I felt that is like giving your money away just to see that few mins of Hebe?! Not worth. Shall save up for m DSLR and Hebe concert instead.

Now finally have time to listen to Selina's voice record. She cried again...

Next up coming event:

31/8- this is a very important date

1/9 or 31/8- shall go back to NCPS

2/9- HEBE'S NEW ALBUM!!!! WOOT! MY LOVE!

and the sep holiday! :D

._.

2011-08-19T22:26:00.002+08:00

Don't feel like talking today in Skype. So now I am a mute.

Failed Phy very badly. I don't know what to say. I just cried to Ahma. Everything is just affecting me now. Omg. I hope I don't be a spoiler tmr.

Ahma was right. She was right. Everything she has said just now to me was right. How true it is. Omg. I want shandy now but my that damn sister drank it without my permission.

Tmr going out again = no time study= failed again.

Sian

Nobody

2011-08-10T21:49:00.004+08:00

Nobody understands the pain I am having right now. If they do, while I am talking on the phone, there won't be so many silent.

I am gonna heck care about the DV campus since my group doesn't care about it despite msg-ing them. Fine, let's die man. 我又不是没死过。

2 days break is seriously none.

I want a break. A break that can last me until I recover from my wound again. I am hurt once again, just like last year. Why can't all these stops seriously? I don't understand, I really don't.

Fate.

Schools for tmr

1) Get scolded

2) Playing hide and seek with someone.

3) Flunk common test

-

2011-08-09T21:49:00.002+08:00

I am becoming angry now and I don't know why.

WTH you want now? Seriously? Can you don't be like LSE?

Stop being like her. I had enough of this kind of friendship game. I am suffering like last year and what is this? I HAD ENOUGH!

First I had to care about my family stuff and now is you. WTH WHAT YOU WANT?

Yesterday want to talk, today want to escape.

WTH YOU WHAT? WHAT YOU WANT?

I had enough of this game you know, really. Yes, it may seems that I am the one who starting it, but I had enough. I am out! I don't want to be like last year, cry and cry just because of one person.

This is stupid and I don't want this to occur again, just before EOY then I flunk all my subjects. I HAD ENOUGH! I AM OUT OF THIS GAME. Omg.

I have a lot of things to care about. This is not the time and now.

I will slap myself okay? Is my fault.

I don't want that idiotic pain to come back just like last year. I am out of this game. Last yesr is not going to happen this year.

Is my fault okay? I will slap myself. Jidan.

Alone part 3

2011-08-09T20:40:00.002+08:00

Alone.

Today is Singapore's Birthday. HAPPY BIRTHDAY SINGAPORE! :D

Something happened yesterday and just nice dear posted on my wall with a Hey:)

Omg, that really warms me up. Out of sudden, I felt that she can sense whether I am happy or not at some point in time. But I know is not.

Oh well I am speechless for yesterday. Really. Haish...

Shall end here then.

Alone- Friends- Part 2

2011-07-25T23:23:00.003+08:00

Sitting in front of computer typing this today, alone.

Friends, I seriously doubt this word, again. Who the hell invented this word? Who is it? ._.

Friends gives me so much trouble that I can't resist on. I have no idea whether did I lock my that post, but if I didn't, it would be great. Seriously.

This is like what happened to me and So Eui. This kind of thing happen again. Same period of time some more. -.-

Fate? It is fate that all the friends that I think we are close and best and knows me well will become like this? Or is it that I will eventually build a wall between them myself?

Saw this post today and I really have no idea whether it was referring to me:

I have been from translucent to transparent to you.

Wow?

Um.... I hesitated for a moment. To me, to this situation that we are facing on, it was seriously damn true.

Dear arh, why am I facing this kind of problem again like we did? ._. I seriously have no idea and don't understand. Can you teach me what to do? ._. I know right? The god is trying to play with me. He wants to take away me friends when I need them so much... like now, at this moment when I am facing a lot of shit problems... For about... 4 months already.

Sigh.

Oh, there you are on FB updating status at about 12 plus in K now? Posting in a language that I don't know....

Sigh.

When will my hell day be over? I want December to come now. Sadly, it is still July, ending soon. Time do really files. EOY coming and I am still suck at Sciences and English. What the hell am I doing? I am still suck at friendship even though I've met through lots of difficulties...

WHAT THE SHIT AND HELL AND.... AM I DOING???

What the... Seriously...

And I can't get my DSLR at the end of my 2 years.... ._.

I can't get Joe's book for now...

I can't go Sundown to look for Hebe...

I can't go whenever I like now.

I can't go London

I can't go Manchester to look for my Man Utd

I can't get an Iphone/ pod

I can't get whatever I want

I can't get a smart phone

I can't get a laptop FROM my own parents

I even think,

I can't go to Taiwan at the end of this year...

Everything is all....

I can't.

But

I need to face him EVERYDAY

I need to face those teachers who thinks they are good EVERYDAY... (accept for Weekends)

I need to get well for my studies in order to my life BETTER

I need to support her if not she will crash and burn.

I need to support these entire family ONE DAY

I need to get myself up

I need to face my stupid and crash Friendship

I need to face all my friends everyday with a fake smile

I need to GET all my stuff done before get screamed by Lao Feng again

I need to...

I need to....

Then If I do all these,

WHO IS GOING TO SUPPORT ME?

I cannot get my Wants.

I only can get my needs...

Crap right? I am truly a no life teenager... Because,

I. AM. POOR.

I am not as rich as you or others.

I can't have a TV in my room.

My mum won't even buy my idol stuff for me. I have to get my own.

So,

I envy you. Seriously.

Since I am born to this world, 我就是命中注定。命中注定有这么一生。

He is now shaking his leg now, don't do anything. And SHE IS GOING TO CLEAR ALL HIS RUBBISH?? LIKE WHAT THE HELL

Like what the hell seriously...

I got to help too. I feel like to. I can't...

I should be the one working and not you all seriously...

FML FML FML FML FML!

Alone- friends part 1

2011-07-23T23:52:00.004+08:00

Here I am sitting on my bed... Alone.

I was thinking and recalling of those times that we had.

Aren't they wonderful? Ya, they were... once wonderful and happy times we had...

Today, we can't go back anymore.

Remember when 娱乐帮 was first started? I bet none remember....

Even worse, I think they had forgotten what is 娱乐帮.

These days, I have been thinking what Rachel told me about the times when Me and Mil gave her a cold shoulder... She said that

"You should have told me earlier about all these..."

Ya, true. But I didn't thought of that at that moment although YZ told me and Mil to talk to her...

Remember the first time We went to watch Soccer match.... We were so happy! Taking photo like nobody's business...

At that time, I really thought that: These are my wonderful friends who will accompany me throughout my Journey.

I... was.... wrong?

Where are they now?

S.P.I.L.T

娱乐帮 has dismiss?

When?

Mildred is no longer that Mildred where she can talk to Rachel with any topic like nobody's business. Apart from us... Drifting like nobody's business

Wen Ting is no longer that happy Wen Ting... We seldom go out together now...

YZ remains the same but no longer that engage with Rachel... Seldom with Mildred... Often with me.... Frequently with 糖醋鱼 and Chua......

Rachel who is now with XY's clique, with JY, with Jon and whoever she likes in E1... Drifting from whoever she have been in Sec 1 and 2...

and Finally...

糖醋鱼。Jolene Teo

Drifting like nobody business too. Seldom talk like what we did in the past.We can talk any rubbish, anything we like. I can cry in front of her like she is my sister. I can be that crazy in front of her... but now I can't. Maybe she don't realise. But I do.

Very engage with YZ now. I can see. The only and one topic we had now is... Hebe?!

Is this all I want?

Obviously not.

Why our topic is only revolve around Hebe? Why do we have a wall between us now? I don't see a need to... but this stupid wall have just build up.

So, is Chua the only person I can talk to now... in our clique?

I am speechless.

Where are you all? Mildred, Yi Zhen, Rachel, Chua, Wen Ting and...

Jolene?

I miss the past. Really miss that.

Can we go back to that time?

全民女孩 part 1

2011-07-07T23:03:00.002+08:00

最近在讀阿中寫的那本《上蒼選了妳》
感觸蠻多的。而且很多經典句詞。。。
現在回想，S真的受了很多痛。所以現在如果我跌倒，我會問我自己:
你受的傷有比她的痛嗎？
她的遭遇，真的很。。。
想到就有點感到傷感。但是從S的故事可以學到她的勇敢！！

今天陪了全民女孩走到第五十五天。

你真的太勇敢了！

我永遠會記住任爸所對阿中說的這句話:

面對，處理，放下。

选择性的失意

2011-06-23T23:58:00.003+08:00

選擇性的失意又浮現在我腦海裡．
有時候我問我自己．
這樣會好點嗎？
我還能堅持著嗎？

今天唱的兩首歌還覺得自己還蠻給力的。

寂寞和我想我不會愛你。

寂寞中有這樣的一個歌詞:
每個人有每個人的業障因果

我想我不會愛你:
我想我不會恨你傷的痕跡
住在我心底變成了秘密

這兩首歌的歌詞如今我才深深的體會到它在說什麼。

還有

發現我的計劃成功。因為，我完全不知道原來田喜碧有幫張智成拍過MV. 這說明我已經慢慢地把"田安陳阮" 這四個人拋在後面。漸漸的我也不怎麼關心他們的news....

该是时候慢慢放下了。。。

暂时告别田安陈阮。　

有时说变就变就像焰火

下一秒消失不见。　

Credit: www.weibo.com/anyixuan

坚持

2011-06-20T23:22:00.003+08:00

＂當你巳經沒有什麼再可以失去的時候，那就是你開始得到的時候。＂

這句話來自喬恩的blog。單單從她那《堅持》的文章中就學到了滿多東西的。。。
我想，我還沒那麼有堅持的理念這種東西。因為，我堅持的事很多時候都會變成空。

我堅持

朋友是不能被看得很輕的。
但往往卻沒有如此。

我堅持

我每天必須讀書
但每次都會坐在電腦面前和你們面對面。

我堅持

我不動田喜碧
但還是會去動。

所以我堅持的東西都會變成一場空。。。

恩董現在在camp. 不知現在在做什麼。喝飲料？ LOL
Mil 呢？
CYZ 呢？
Chua 呢？
你們。。。都在幹嗎？
還有多幾天，架起就結束。

就讓它結束吧。

“堅強是一種對比，你可以觀察身邊很多的人事物。

堅持是一種信念，然而…

這樣的信念，只存於在很少數很少數那一塊。

當你清楚什麼是懦弱，你才會知道什麼是堅強。

而那一刻，你會覺得…

哇～～其實我挺堅強的啊…哈哈..

那一刻…請大方為自己感到驕傲。

就算沒有人知道。”

www.realjoechen.com

紀佳松音樂贊！

Part 2

2011-06-19T23:33:00.003+08:00

I am gonna tear Mil apart. MIA like so long. She loves Malaysia yeah?! -.-

Went for a photo shooting trip today @ MBS. Conclusion: I'm in love with photography and wanna get a DSLR the moment I have that power. Currently, I love my cam very much L120. :D

Feel like asking Desmond to teach me photography skill although I am not holding a DSLR... LOLS.

I want to sing. I am so going to sing out loud. This has been in my mind for the entire day today. I don't think anybody will be free on Tuesday -.-

shall I sing alone? Maybe I should yeah? Although maybe going out on Thursday but there's a small chance that can go and sing... T.T

I WANT TO SING!

广岛之恋

人生之旅 part 1

2011-06-19T00:03:00.005+08:00

我正在旅游中。而且这个旅游不是一个礼拜或一个月，而是很久很久。

Plane Flight: FH0330149

Tour name: 人生之旅

Country: Um....

Tour Guide: God/Nature

如果说从那件事以后是人生之旅的开始，那我还真的成长了不少。只是，这些东东是不能表现出来的。。。。

Went to Singapore Flyer today. It was totally AWESOME! It was nice using L120 to take photos of the view. It really makes me wanna get a DSLR but I know, that's impossible.

Kept on typing and posting F You on a particular day on Twitter. Okay that wasn't a good example. Sorry, I just couldn't control it. What was in my head was.... that word, ya, no doubt.

金曲奖二十二届 just ended. I think all the winners are having their party now. As expected, Hebe didn't won the Best Album award. 毕竟还算新人. Hebe 还有很长的路要走呢。。。再接再厉！

Just got this from Weibo and I think this is what makes me think that 田馥甄 is cool.

“因為在這十年當中，我們贏得的是友情，是姐妹中的愛，勝過任何東西，我們自己非常滿足的。

Yes of course, no doubt that their friendship is the most precious things among them. Admire and wish them all the best. Seriously, I think is time to put Hebe aside. I spent too much time on her.

人生之旅，I've complete 1% of it only.

Up Next: Hebe's album

Harry Potter 7

Cars 2

乔见。猫

阿中's Book

watch GL again if possible with E

I feel nothing

2011-06-12T00:29:00.005+08:00

Got back from SH 2 days ago. I feel nothing.

Remembered this night. I talk to C like hell when we were walking along the 外滩. I won't forget that night seriously. Is nice talking with C but.... actually I wanted to find ahma that night.

Overall, SH was quite a nice place and learnt something from it, though, Mil was not there.

Think quite a lot while I am there. Actually, I shouldn't because it should be a time when I finally have my own peace and relax, but I just couldn't relax myself. Till the day I came back to SG, I feel nothing, I feel the same. No changes. Nothing.

I feel nothing.

Everything has been back to normal the moment I touched Singapore, breath in and out of Singapore's air. I feel nothing.

Kinda missed the moment when I'm in SH. How I wish Mil was there too. Lol.

Currently reading the book 《我在雨中等你》

"你的心，决定你看见的"

SHERO Part 1

2011-05-30T23:14:00.003+08:00

Was listening to "SHERO" today.

Everybody should be their own Shero and be strong. That was what I thought today because I found that some of us are becoming weaker and weaker in terms of emotional.

Anyway, cousins went back to America left my uncle. Lol. Having lots of fun when they were around. Especially times when we went to Sentosa. SHIOK!

Drifting further from friends maybe because of I am too focus on my studies and spent time together with my family for these 3 days... Should get back to them.

Going to school tmr to get noted from C!!! Hehe hope can bump to YZ too :D

Off to proposal again!

SHERO!

:D

2011-05-27T22:41:00.006+08:00

Cousins came my house today because special guess came to my house too! My anothe cousin from AMERICA! :D

Anyway, got back results and it was totally suckish. As expected, flunk 2 subjects. Nice right? retest gonna take place 3rd June for me. Currently trying to work hard for it. I hope I won't disappoint anyone. Especially Ahma.

Thank god or anyone in Heaven that I met Ahma. I am very thankfull to her. She did a brief Chem note for me until 1am yesterday! I am speechless. I am really thankfull to her. If i flunk again, I've nothing to say but maybe....cry again?

Cried twice because of my results. In my secondary school life, this is my second time crying over my results. I didn't expect to get this shit out of no where. Especially my Chem and English.

Fate you know? Haish.....

Anyway, was suppose to go USS tmr, but change plan. -.- disappointed though, but nvm, I can go with my friends :D

I am tired. Ya. Speechless for something too. I don't even want to talk about it. I don't care anymore. When I say it, I mean it. Nothing is going to affect my life.

FYI, 忍耐是有限的.

Feel like asking my cousin to go K with me before I go ShangHai! And I should do that! :D

Workhard!

????? Part 2

2011-05-21T22:16:00.002+08:00

I am sorry. Really sorry.

C, I know, you will be crying now. Really.
I didn't expect things to turn out this way.

I hope, after today, everything will be fine. If you want to cry, please do. After today, please don't think anymore. Really.

I am really..... really....

???? Part 1

2011-05-21T20:45:00.002+08:00

Gosh.... what have I done that made you so angry?

C problem? Actually I really don't know what I had done that made you so angry....
Was about to call you and explain C problem to you. Because, I swear, I didn't mean to accuse her or anything. I do realised that it was my fault and I didn't mean to cheat you or whatsoever. I just don't have the time to call you or to explain it to you until now. Seriously. I swear. Seriously.

Yes it do might be hurting that you didn't pick up my phone by can you give me a chance to explain myself?

I bet you told XY too.

But really,

What have I done other then this? At least you must tell me right before you can be that angry at me....

其实想一想
就如你所说的
真的很累。
但你不理我，我也不知道发生什么事
这问题，可解决吗？
感叹。。。

The worse of all,
不做朋友？
哭咯。。。

:) / :( Part 3

2011-05-19T21:07:00.002+08:00

Went to K today.

Some songs that were sang somehow makes me feel sad though... but I told myself I should be happy because is K SESSION!

Exam gonna over soon, left with a HMT paper 2. :D Happy?! Yeah.....

After the exams, gonna have a good relax. Really looking forward going to Shanghai. Finally, I can leave this shit place and relax after like.... 1 year?

:D Be happy. My motto :D

Welcome back WenTing. Glad to see that they are okay now :D

:)/ :( Part 2

2011-05-18T13:27:00.004+08:00

三人的友情是如此坚固的。老婆。

Is another day.

Yesterday, I shouldn't have drank the Mocha coffee, end up I could not sleep well and think too much -.-

YX told me that she did came and visit my blog. :D A big thank you.

My conclusion is, think too much is not good.

Should post some happy things in future... but currently none.
A math=flunk=die
Shit that teacher who set the paper -.- I love A maths! -.-
Addicted to 魔力. Shit sia....
Intoducing one song to you,
中箭-古巨基

:) / :(

2011-05-16T23:13:00.003+08:00

“努力想会让你开心的事，那么，妳的笑就会是发自内心的笑:)”
“ 不要努力地假笑。。要努力地开心活着:) 不要浪费青春的岁月~~~”

我一直非常感恩一件事。我非常感恩老天爷能让我认识到这么一群好友，这么一群傻人陪我一起傻。。。
以上的那句是来自咋们恩董的话。。。

怎么说，
我是要同意不？我自个也不清楚。。。
我只知道，今天又发生了个不愉快的事。。。而且，对我来说是超不愉快。。。而我今天又假笑的上学了。为何不能平静呢？

我的一生好像。。。都很不愉快。:( 悲哀不？而且，又有人不理我了。
我好无奈。真的好无奈。我什么忙也帮不上。很无奈。
为什么要关心我的人没来而我不想的却又一直来？你在哪儿？我真的很想把一切都告诉你，可是你却迟迟都不来找我。我真的很无奈。
我忍了，有好几个月了。。。
真的好几个月。我无法把我内心的一切真正的表达出来。无奈。
我现在终于明白，
SHE为何唱“魔力”会哭了。
我的魔力们，我多么希望你们现在在我的身边。
你们
在哪儿？

这是我第二次，听着这首歌，又哭了。
魔力，你在哪儿?

:D

2011-05-15T00:20:00.002+08:00

Wow, One month one post? This is lols....

I have been thinking this question for the past few days....
If only friendship is like a metal, how nice would it be.
But
Will I have one like this?
Oh well.... I think at least I have 3 who have accompanied me throughout the tough weeks I have been to.

Currently disappointed with Rachel Yap. Ya, I am gonna say the truth out here. Because, she didn't realise what's the hell is the earth going on and continue in her lalaland thinking that nothing has happened. Oh my... I just hope she has realised that our friendship is breaking.

Ya, Glad that Jolene, Mildred and Yi Zhen have been with me through this tough weeks. Or I should say the month and the rest of the month...

I didn't tell them what exactly happened but I told ahma.
Didn't tell SE cuz I really don't have the chance and I think she might not be interested either. She is stress yeah?

Life have change since that problem occur. It has been tough and I am sick and tired of facing the same person every single day. With that person doing nothing and not even take the effort in finding a proper J.... Please, I am really sick and tired of all these...

If he had not did all this stuff, I think my life would have been easier. Slightly. He just add on to it and....

Was sweating like hell on Friday and told Mil that I have been memorising the Chem stuff on BUS.

Jo was like.... Bus? I thought you have been traveling by car?
I was like
Yeah, that's a few month ago... That's why I've said my life change after that incident took place.

But yeah, Glad that 3 of them are with me. Currently my close friend and best. Especially Jo. :D

Hope life will be better.

Oh well, Off to Physic!

A big thanks to Jolene, Mildred and Yi Zhen.
Ahma of course.

这首歌送给那三个怪咔。。。三个傻人。。。三个要好的朋友。
老婆，我们会的。

Yo...

2011-04-09T22:04:00.001+08:00

I am back.

Didn't post for at least a month... WOW! Clap hand!

Currently busy over NP and TXY stuff....

LOL!

Going to....

2011-02-10T21:50:00.002+08:00

Going to be one month soon.... Haish.... Monday will be the day....

没说再见

2011-01-15T12:14:00.004+08:00

天凉了雨下了你走了
清楚了我爱的遗失了
落叶飘在湖面上睡着了
想要放放不掉泪在飘
你看看你看看不到
我假装过去不重要却发现自己办不到

说了再见才发现再也见不到
我不能就这样失去你的微笑
口红待在桌脚而你我找不到
若角色对调你说好不好

说了再见才发现再也见不到
能不能就这样忍着痛泪不掉
说好陪我到老永恒往哪里找
再次拥抱一分一秒都好

天凉了雨下了你走了
清楚了我爱的遗失了
落叶飘在湖面上睡着了
想要放放不掉泪在飘
你看看你看看不到
我假装过去不重要却发现自己办不到

说了再见才发现再也见不到
我不能就这样失去你的微笑
口红待在桌脚而你我找不到
若角色对调你说好不好

你的笑你的好脑海里一直在绕
我的手忘不了你手的温度
心碎了一地捡不回从前的心跳
身陷过去我无力逃跑

说再见才发现再也见不到
能不能就这样忍着痛泪不掉
说好陪我到老永恒往哪里找
再次拥抱一分一秒都好
-----------------------------------------------------------------
我昨天没说再见，她就走了。
我昨天忍着这痛一直到今天。
我今天终于哭了出来。
我真的好痛，好痛。
我昨天为什么看不到她？为什么？
最后一天，为什么我不能和她说再见？
过了昨天，我不知道几时还会再见到她。
为什么老天爷就是不给我说再见的机会？
我真的很痛，真的真的很痛。
没有人会知道我有多痛。
就连最了解我的人都不会知道。
我现在一看到她的照片，我会想起昨天的情形。我就会想哭。
我昨天像疯子一样，不停的在机场内找她。
我等了很久。她始终没有出现在我面前。
一直到我看到facebook上她写的那一句再见的话，我才知道
她竟然在十三分钟前上了飞机。
我。。。无言了。

我很想当场在机场内哭，可是我忍了一直到今天。
我会后悔没去那个聚餐吗？有点。
但我的后悔昨天没去机场柜台叫那个人报她的名字出来，通过PA System 把她找出来。
也许。。。也许。。。一切会不一样。
我很后悔。
这会是我一辈子的遗憾。一辈子。。。

Crap.

2011-01-06T17:01:00.002+08:00

Seriously what's going on with me?

It's only the beginning of the year and the worse of all is only the 3rd day of school and I am feeling that way? What nonsense is this?

What's going on with me seriously?

Nowadays I don't feel like going to school and the worse of all is ONLY 3rd day of school and I am stress.

What is this? Kao. What's wrong with me?

Should I tell JY, J, WT, C or CYZ about this? Yesterday told my problem to E but it seems no cure to it.

Anyway made a wrong move yesterday by sms-ing SE. I thought she was still awake and I sms her with a stupid question at night because of Rachel. In the end, wake her up. Really sorry about that.

Now, seriously, I.... drag going to school.

又被放鸽子

2010-12-17T21:24:00.002+08:00

看来今天我又被同样的人放鸽子。我等了又等，她始终还是没打来。。。Sadded ._.
最近又要变Emo了。原因？我不会说。我心里现在很乱也很难过。

刚刚有电话打来，我以为是她，结果不是。空欢喜一场。

算了。这已经不是第一次我被放鸽子了。

如果可以，我想抱那个牌子回家。馥甄。

对任小弟的敬意。

2010-12-12T19:46:00.002+08:00

这是阿中在Selina事发后的一个月发表的算是第二个文章吧。

一個月來，她每天的生活很簡單。

就是反覆地清創、植皮、換藥、麻醉、止痛，伴隨著免疫系統弱化、感染不斷，發燒、疱疹、盜汗、胸悶、發抖、昏睡、惡夢、失眠、意識不清、忽冷忽熱，以及永無止盡的劇痛。原來，大面積三度灼傷的折磨，求死都不得，因為她不能動，而且有好一陣子，她痛得連咬舌的力氣都沒有。我不知道她哪來的神力可以走到今天。

她好想康復，但不論排便、翻身、復健，每個小動作都要花好久時間，每個小進步都痛徹心扉。她怕嗎啡成癮，常常告誡自己不要依賴藥物，再多忍一下；她憂心任爸日漸消瘦，每天咬牙逼自己進步，讓任爸心安；她的手指還不靈活，但她會要我幫她連上網，看你們的留言，邊看邊哭，邊看邊笑。她看到自己紅腫的臉，自嘲像關公，卻偷偷地哭，問我臉會不會好；她換藥時不小心瞄到雙腿，自己形容好像拼圖，然後傻笑、發呆；她常若有所思，過一會委屈痛哭失聲：『我待人很好啊，為什麼要我承受各式各樣的痛？我這個樣子怎麼辦？』過一會又強顏安慰自己：『我已經很幸運了，好多人關心我，我會加油！』每次換藥，她一定禱告，祈求上蒼賜她承受疼痛的力量；每晚睡前，她一定禱告，感激上蒼她又挨過了一天，懇請上蒼幫助她面對明天，乞求上蒼讓她能睡著。

如果她能暫時沒有意識沒有感覺，應該會好過一些。

一個月來，我每天的生活也很簡單。

就是無助地看著這一切，看著她痛、看著她苦笑、看著她擔心、看著她情緒起伏、看著她故作鎮定、看著她放聲大哭。我束手無策，我只會騙她：『撐過今天！明天，就會好多了…』明天再騙她一次。

我不是菩薩，我不停地想：這個考驗應該要有意義吧？對她，是天將降大任嗎？對HE，她們的友情還需要考驗嗎？對我，要我每天看著她受罪，難道是考驗我的抗壓指數嗎？還是在考驗任爸任媽的慈悲？不會是要考驗歌迷吧？那對電視台？對指揮現場的導演、劇組？爆破師？是有意義的吧？日前上海大樓失火死傷逾百人，天啊！我感同身受，不敢想像卻又完全能想像的恐怖畫面，在我腦中揮之不去。公安立即著手調查，可能是因為涉及失火、爆炸及過失致人死傷罪吧？那麼，電視台說她的事故起因於過失，會有人告訴我們發生了什麼事嗎？還是，我錯了，我應該什麼都不要想，考驗就是考驗，不需要有答案，不當然有意義。

如果我能不要看不要想，應該會好過一些。

我真的比你們幸運嗎？我知道我比你們幸運，你們可能比我更擔心、更無助、更難過。我相信她的每一個明天都會比今天進步，我也相信這個考驗會是有意義的。

中

http://www.him.com.tw/forum_1.asp?fid=27981&sid=27

我看了超过三遍。这遍文章感动了我。对阿中的疑问，仅仅十四岁的我觉得这些都不是考验，而是命运。上天要Selina经过这一切。因为对于你所问的我觉得都不再需要什么考验了。可能上天看到Selina什么都有，什么都好，要她受一点苦。问我为什么它要这样做？我也不知道。这世界就是那么不公平。但我很佩服Selina的勇敢。我每天从任爸任妈的微博上看到她一天一天不断的努力与进步，虽然有崩溃的时候但她还是很勇敢地走下去。要是我可能也不会这样吧。我诚心的希望老天爷能够保佑Selina，希望她能够度过这一关，也请老天爷不要再折磨她或她身边的人。一个女生再这么坚强也受不了自己的外表被吹毁。我真的很佩服你，Selina。希望过了这一次，Selina可以快快乐乐的继续过她的人生。Selina, Jiayou!

田喜碧！

2010-12-01T22:43:00.003+08:00

真不知道为什么这张照片不能放上Facebook-.- 真素滴。。。但喜碧夫人的表情真是有够可爱的啦！爱你！
最近有些不开心。都是某人害的-.- 算了。所以呢为了保持身心健康，天天开心，我就每天看这天团的视频！:D 她们真是搞笑到不行！！哈哈哈哦，终于啊。。。可以post上！！开心。。。哈哈哈！
这几天这都不能影响我！！我要开心的玩个痛快！！

猪头。

2010-11-30T00:21:00.006+08:00

你是怎么了？你这个王八蛋。为什么你每次有事都要装着没事一样。可恶。你是猪吗？为什么你每次有事我都不知道的？为什么？然后我每次说的东西都不理会。你是想怎样？猪头。你现在是怎样？啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊。我快气疯了。你。。。你。。。
你真的是一个猪头！！！！！！！！！而且是一个很大的猪头！！！！可恶。你知道我今天已看到你post的东西，我很难吃得下饭，你知道吗？我一直看S.H.E的Video希望我自己会开心点。是有点，但是过后又会回去一样的心情。你到底是怎么了？还有很长的日子要过，你可以不要让我担心吗？就像你讲的，如果你不想让我知道，你就不要express at Facebook！反正你已经和某某某讲了对不对？天啊。。。我很难不想你的事，谁可以来帮帮我？你这个猪头。

Fair?

2010-11-23T23:12:00.003+08:00

Got my combi and class afterall. I don't know what to say. Ya, I got what I want at the same time lost things which I think is important to me. This world is so unfair.

Fine. Shouldn't talk about that.Meet CYZ and Corliss for lunch. Went to Kinokuniya to buy S.H.E things. Went to Hougang mall to meet LJY and PYZ. Homed. That's my day. Lols

Tmr gonna play basketball. Lols

我得到我想要的。在这同时，我也失去对我来说是重要的东西。这是世界就是如此的不公平。

2010-11-16T22:13:00.003+08:00

要说什么
杯子都已经空了
闭上眼睛心里下起大雪天寒又地冻
是不是到了
爱情结帐的时候
只剩下各自买单的寂寞
为什么当我推开门
他没有来拉住我

他还不懂还是不懂
离开是想要被挽留
如果开口那只是我要来的温柔
他还不懂永远不懂
一个拥抱能代替所有
爱绝对能够动摇我

要用什么
融化这一片沉默
在四周的冷空气里叹息化成烟飘走
过去的种种在心里滚成雪球
怕还没说话泪就会先流
爱不是他给得不多
是不知道我要什么
他还不懂还是不懂
离开是想要被挽留
如果开口那只是我要来的温柔
他还不懂永远不懂
一个拥抱能代替所有
爱绝对能够动摇我

都是背了太多的心愿
流星才会跌的那么重
爱太多心也有坠毁的时候

他还不懂还是不懂
离开是想要被挽留
如果开口那只是我要来的温柔
他还不懂永远不懂
一个拥抱能代替所有
爱绝对能够动摇我
在第一时间拯救我
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hell

2010-11-16T21:22:00.002+08:00

What the F. You simply don't know what is called Family! You simply don't know what is Husband and Wife! Since you don't know, mind as well you GET LOST! What the F. You idiot.

I shouldn't let this jerk to pollute my blog.

Np today. Tired. Finally resting at home tmr. Thursday is the actual performance.

Dying soon....

2010-11-15T18:27:00.003+08:00

Super tired. What the.... was like training from 8am - 12.30pm? Hands and Legs are super pain now. Early in the morning was like in pumping position for 5-10 mins? What the.... I can't imagine what will be like for the Dec one. Tmr is another hell day also. ARHHHH!!!!

Had a talk session with dear Ying Xue (XueYing's sister hahaha joking) and Xue Ying Omg. After that talk, it really change the mindset of someone in my mind. Seriously, it's too over yeah? Dear you, will you please don't be so lol? Poor Xue Xue.... I'll always support you :D yeah!

Had a chat with LSE just now. I shouldn't elaborate more. Listen to 馥甄's Album for like 45 mins or so. The ablum repeated for 3 times.... Wow... Amazing.

Seriously hell for tmr. I MUST NOT SICK!!! ARH!!!!!!!!!!!!

逃离

2010-11-11T22:14:00.002+08:00

是的，就像恩董说的，不管出哪里都好，就想逃离新加坡，去一个地方呼吸那里的空气，暂时忘掉一切。我要出国，我要去台湾。I WANT TO GO TO TAIWAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

刚刚才得知，我的表姐今年年底会去台湾跨年。我要去!!!!! 可恶。不公平！不。公。平！

我和你都受够这里了。这个充满着恶心，不好的地方。我现在连回家的念头都没有。我只想一只呆在我阿姨家。我不想回家！虽然说家是最温暖的地方，但是现在，很抱歉，我只想逃离我的家。

我。要。出。国

魔力 S.H.E

2010-11-11T20:07:00.002+08:00

I have you to be with
Everything will be easy
晒的阳光
淋的雨滴
都值得回忆

I have you to be with
懂心不够近才怕距离
心电感应
绝不断讯
会如影随形

曾灰心以为
我来错了世界
太多想法很另类
找不到人了解
当我说的感觉
牵动着你的脸
互动的泪
让我们变得特别

你是我的魔力
想要勇敢就想你
一眨眼睛
把不如意
都变成流星
你是我的魔力
心情不好我就想你
删除忧郁
复制甜蜜
幸福是间电影院

没有单人的座位
要肩并肩
才能看好戏上演

最大的一步

2010-11-10T19:40:00.002+08:00

因为某某人，我走出了我最大的一步。我今天FB msg 她。但msg她以后，我想，我这样做对吗？我不应该把这件事情告诉她，毕竟我没有得到某某人人的同意。所以，我不会告诉她。但是这样的话，我有什么事告诉她吗？其实没有。我不会去问她我所post 的东西除非她自己问。所以。。。。。haiz..... 我的天啊！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！

想太多？

2010-11-09T23:31:00.003+08:00

Maybe is I think too much or what but I really want a answer back. Sometimes when I post that kind of thing to a person I will feel like Hey, am I thinking too much? Maybe that's not the case, but I really want to know. All this starts from this post "What a wonderful though you have"

Or really is I think too much? Like what ahma asked me, She knows your blog? I am wondering too........ Seriously, if we didn't talk for this 2 months, I seriously think that there is something wrong between 2 of us... I still remember what you told me in your last call- "Talk in msn okay?" and "We've not talk for a long time"

ARHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

我很烦啊！！！！！！
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Something is going on....

2010-11-09T22:45:00.002+08:00

Went to XY's house today to discuss about class chalet. No bad, we got all the ideas we wanted, what we can do now is to wait for the class reply. After that had lots of fun there... lols. Played their Wii, table tennis and badminton :D Oh ya and the forefit thingy.... lols

The above picture is really true. Posted by Rene Liu in her 微博.
有些时候说出“我没事”这三个字是逼不得以的。但有些人就是傻傻的以为你真的没事，说了一句“那好”等等类似冷漠的话就走掉了。。。

我们之间发生了什么事吗？我这次要弄清楚。因为，我不想再这样胡思乱想了。每天起来，一直想一直想。如果是因我而起，那就跟我讲好吗？如果是因为那个post，那也跟我讲嘛！你这样的冷漠方式我受不了。我不是一个主动的人。我不会那样的问你，Eh。。。那个，你是不是看到了或者。。。那个，我们之间是不是发生了什么事等等。我再次强调，我不是一个主动的人！我也不想这样子隔国的冷战。那样我们明年见面会怎么样？真的，虽然Ahma 告诉我，她觉得我们之间没发生什么事，但是我感觉有！拜托你，告诉我，我们之间到底发生了什么事？还是，我想太多了？

是的，李昭宜，Lee So Eui 我说的是你。看到了，请联络我！

Be Happy

2010-11-07T16:58:00.002+08:00

I should be happy and not to think about other stuff. Why should I care since you don't even care a single thing?

This week quite busy. Tmr FREE but gonna work on design. Tue going to XY house with CYZ. Wednesday going to work on the banner with others -.- hell. Thursday going out with Kirby. Friday going out to celebrate!!

I should make myseld busy so that I won't think of other stupid things. I should exchange with 恩董 yeah? I should work and she should have the time to relax.....

我不care

2010-11-06T22:07:00.003+08:00

为什么我要在意你所post 的每一个东西？

我不care 了。我不CARE!

我现在在想什么？

我现在只想大哭一场。
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

我不懂

2010-11-06T16:21:00.002+08:00

我不懂为什么我满脑子想的都是以前的事？为什么？我不明白。现在我的心情就像这片天空一样。我好无助。我无法找一个人讲出我心里所有的话和感受。我好痛苦。为什么我突然会有这样的心态？为什么？我想在无法post 除我对那个人的愤怒和失望。我无法。

我第一个想告诉的人，是你。可是，我已经告诉我自己从今以后我不要再打扰你。。。怎么办？我好无助。

你太猖狂

2010-11-06T16:05:00.001+08:00

能约出来的人都约光
能吃得下的早已吃光
很用力谈笑比哭还绝望
怎么挨得到打烊

我以为痛苦可以分散
于是我忙到不能再忙
忙到忘记了洗掉你所有短讯
一字一巴打在我脸上

思念太猖狂一个冷不防
一想起你忙碌的生活变得空荡荡
对心事说谎把你想到多么的不堪
伟大的你还想我怎样

我以为工作能够疗伤
甚至恨不得病倒再算
没力气遐想谁知瘫痪在床上
越发渴望你就在身旁
思念太猖狂一个冷不防
一想起你忙碌的生活变得空荡荡
对心事说谎把你想到多么的不堪
伟大的你还想我怎样

你也太猖狂一个冷不防
睡到一半才觉醒疗伤先要哭一场
对世界说谎只把自己哄骗得更惨
想得到释放只有投降
想得到释放只有投降

如果我变成回忆

2010-11-06T15:23:00.001+08:00

累了照惯例努力清醒着
也照惯例想你了
好怕一放心睡了
心跳在梦中不听话的
就停止了
听着呼吸像浪潮拍动着
越美丽越让我忐忑
我还能珍惜什么
如果我连自己的脉搏都难掌握

如果我变成回忆退出了这场生命
留下你错愕哭泣
我冰冷身体拥抱不了你
想到我让深爱的你人海孤独旅行
我会恨自己如此狠心
如果我变成回忆终于没那么幸运
没机会白着头发
蹒跚牵着你看晚霞落尽
漫长时光总有一天你会伤心痊癒
若有人可以让他陪你
我不怪你
快乐什么时候会结束呢
哪一刻是最后一刻
想把你紧紧抱着
可知你是我生命中的
最舍不得
如果我变成回忆最怕我太不争气
顽固地赖在空气
霸占你心里每一寸缝隙
连累依然爱我的你痛苦承受失去
这样不公平请你尽力
把我忘记

Jealousy

2010-11-02T22:59:00.003+08:00

I hate to be jealous with my best friends. I hate competiting with my best friends. I hate all this.

Why the world must revovle with all this? WHAT THE HELL!

缺点:想太多/容易嫉妒

I AM BACK ONCE AGAIN!

2010-11-01T21:16:00.002+08:00

I am back from camp. WOOT! Finally. Glad to leave that torturing camp asap. NP camp is never a wonderful one. STC.... gosh is a nightmare.

Anyway, attended 金曲奖 with Ms Tay and 恩董on last Friday. SHIOK TTM! Hebe sure rocks. I like the way she say her 得奖感言! Extremely wonderful. S.H.E ROCKS! Want to know more can watch Saturdays broadcast. Maybe got me leh.... HAHA jkjk.

It's Day 4. Like I said to ahma, time flies very fast. I hope in the next 1 plus month, things will go on smoothly...

Day 1

2010-10-28T22:57:00.003+08:00

Today is the last day of school. Wow, time flies. I will miss my 2E1'10 very much. Brought to me laughers and joy which I won't forget. Thank you Mdm Usha -.- , Mr Tung and Ms Abby Goh for contibuting to 2E1 and make it more fun :D

People in 2E1 is way too different from 1E2. I feel that both classes are great! I love both! If I have not been in 2E1, I won't meet Andrea, XinYi, Corliss, Shujuan, Adriana Wow(Nabilah) and others. You all are AWESOME TTM! Thank you for everything.

两个不同世界的人为什么会在一起？
才第一天，
我就想你了。
昨天的那个post，不要管。我乱来的。

我。想。你
Day 1

Fake

2010-10-27T21:52:00.002+08:00

Can hear. It's so damn fake. 要不是我打给你然后按掉，我想你也不会打给我。也许，我不应该这么做。但我不想再让我的心流血了。在流下去，我的血，快用完了。

It's really damn fake. I don't know why I have this feeling. I shouldn't have it. I should trust her. She is the person I trusted the most. Today, it's so damn fake. Your voice/replied is not from your bottom of your heart. I can feel it. You just ask for the seek of doing so. If not the call won't be less than 1 minute. I am super disappointed. I am super disappointed in myself and you. I am disappointed. My heart is bleeding once again...This time, it hurts damn much. I think I can't sleep well tonight.

Before your return, you left this for me.... hurting.

anyway, 一路顺风。

Waiting

2010-10-26T22:42:00.002+08:00

I am just sad and disappointed.

I have been waiting since the day I msg you
I have been waiting all day long.
No news.
I have been waiting for you like an idiot
I have been waiting for you like hell.
No news
I wait and wait and wait.....
What you said, you did none.

I am sad and disappointed.

你又让我流血。。。

流沙

2010-10-26T19:26:00.002+08:00

点点星光再耀眼也会凋谢
情话说的难分难解终将一别
最后留在你身边又会是谁
真心是否远比不上一千朵玫瑰
谁是真谁是假
再狡猾遇上多情也会变傻
那频频回首心碎的人啊
可明白爱仅咫尺天涯
有什么放不下
昨日如烟火未来如流沙
谁知道下一分下一秒会如何变化
有什么放不下
青春如昙花岁月如流沙
天再高地再大也容不下寂寞啊
谈断感情要潇洒
再粉再香的花蕊也会枯萎
用情再深没了感觉终难挽回
最后陪我到终点又会是谁
承诺岂是激情过后无聊的消遣
谁无怨谁无悔
再皎洁浪漫的月也有残缺
当繁华退尽未了的情啊
再缠绵终将事与愿违
别再强说愁自哀自怜
旧情终成为过眼烟
好景既已不再像从前
又何必搁在心头爱早已事过境迁
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

末日之恋

2010-10-26T18:45:00.008+08:00

剩下没多少时间
让我再唱一首歌给你
一过了今夜世界就毁灭
我想我还有一天
可以学会如何来爱你
在来不及以前渴望来得及

闭上眼睛忍住泪别哭泣
末日前夕请留在我怀里
看太阳暗去月光失明
我只想牵你的指尖绕地球最后一圈
黑夜降临别害怕我爱你
末日前夕请留在我怀里
我在这世界最眷恋的事情
就是曾拥抱你

多想永远拥抱你
我感受到什么在剧烈颤抖
是天空或者你的手
别让任何事情打断我看着你
最后一次看着你
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Wonderful Sky

2010-10-26T17:32:00.003+08:00

Photo Credits: http://t.sina.com.cn/1759384395

http://t.sina.com.cn/lefthere
http://t.sina.com.cn/anyixuan

看！这是不是比新加坡的美多了？

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Should I?

2010-10-26T16:56:00.004+08:00

Compared to the photos taken by Ady and Shiou, Singapore's sky is like shit. I shall post up the photos later.

Went to play basketball my own. -.- yeah, kind of pathetic. No choice. If it's not Rachel who went for the NTU thingy, I would have went to find her. Spring around the court too.

Kind of bored today. I should re-write the whole letter.

Day 36
Left with only 1 DAY!

背影

2010-10-25T19:34:00.003+08:00

三公分阳光三公分空气
堵在眼前像一面玻璃
挡住了你表情剩下只有脚印
He……
一直向前走走不完距离
一直向后退不出回忆
很高兴有心事帮我困住自己

你头发上淡淡青草香气
变成了风才能和我相遇
你的目光蒸发成云
再下成雨我才能够靠近
感谢我不可以住进你的眼睛
所以才能拥抱你的背影
有再多的遗憾用来牢牢记住
不完美的所有美丽
感谢我不可以拥抱你的背影
所以才能变成你的背影
躲在安静角落不用你回头看
不用珍惜我怀里所有温暖的空气
变成风也不敢和你相遇
我的心事蒸发成云
再下成雨却舍不得淋湿你
躲在安静角落如果你回头看
不用在意
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hurt

2010-10-25T18:31:00.003+08:00

当你一个人寂寞时，那是很痛苦的。
寂寞时，你也会放空。对我来说，放空是最痛苦的，因为，它会让你想起你根本就不想想的东西。
我怕寂寞。我不想被人抛弃。我不想我的心再一次受到伤害。我不想我的心再一次流血。我不想，我不想。。。
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Officially M.I.A from Facebook. Ask me why? I have no idea. When going back? I have no idea too. I guess I need some peace?

Went to CP today with XueYing and Regine to buy my ATC stuff. Went to library too. Borrowed 3 books. I hope I can settle down myself and read finish it. Os starting. Wish PYZ and LJY goodluck and all the best.

I guess I am emoing again? Cuz I have this 麻and 酸 feeling everytime I am homed. I don't know what happened to me seriously.....

我。怕。寂。寞。

Results

2010-10-23T18:52:00.002+08:00

Everybody is posting about their result. Should I?

Nah. I am just gonna summerised all. Apart from SCIENCE, everything was okay. Freaking science.....

Okay, yesterday went to look for 麦老师. Cute baby. Her house is cute too. Lols.

Wanted to buy some DVD or movie to watch but none of it caught my eyes. T.T waiting for 童眼's DVD to be out :D

:D

2010-10-20T21:57:00.002+08:00

MIA for so long! I AM BACK!

Okay, went and watched this moive 童眼 with Ting/Jolene/Szeyong and Jeremy.
Wanted to go East Coast today but they all say NO to me and WT. Too bad go somewhere else then go East Coast with WT again someday ba.

Saw LSE, Jaylin and XY meeting together @ compass too. I hope they don't think I'm pretending I don't know them. I did smile but don't know whether they notice.....

Alright after that movie we lotter around Orchard and PS. Saw MR MILO! LOLS!

Nice day with them :D \m/

2010-10-01T20:28:00.001+08:00

After this post, shall do my art.

Exams coming. Although I did study, it seems not to get into my mind......

Really very worried about my exam... haiz....

Morning...

2010-09-26T09:25:00.003+08:00

Early in the morning my feeling is very down.....

Yesterday. have a 1:30:35 hours talk with Jolene.

It makes me feel kind of sad. I am so sorry that I can't comfort you that much.

Although I did went through the same thing like you. I mean the feeling, but I am very sorry that I can't try to comfort you and give you some advice.....

A listening ear is really not enough dear Jolene. Really, it's not enough.....

恩董，我只能给你两个字

坚。强。

32 days left

2010-09-25T08:21:00.004+08:00

Woke up quite early today. Later going to meet up with Ms Yi Zhen :)

Dearmt of dear LSE actually. Didn't post on FB cuz I think that will be very lol. Talk to her yesterday on FB chat. Once again, I think too much. Fine! I should just stop thinking about anything today and focus on my exam/project.

Many things just happened this week..... A bit tired but still need to CHIONG!!

Remember PYL
It's just 2 weeks to exam
MUST FOCUS!!
After that exam week,
you can have fun then :D

I realised that yesterday, 我把李小黄变成李小白...... OMG!!

Day 5
Left with 32 days

2010-09-24T18:02:00.004+08:00

Reason for yesterday why I walked back from Compass to home is beacause, I wanted to think of what she have said to me. I would say that, I agreed with each and every point you said. Still, I need time to get over my feelings.

周杰伦有这么一首歌，
回到过去
但，你说的对，我们的关系已不能变回以前了。
记得有一次在电话中你有这样说过。
现在的我可能已无法像以前这样，说笑，玩。。。
我现在看到你，我无法面对你。
为什么？
我也不知道。

Just like today, when I looked at you at the library, I kept on putting my head on Jolene's shoulder just to avoid seeing you. Later, I went to sit beside Mildred so that I can totally not see you. When I wanted to find rachel, I still hesitated for a while which I don't have this feeling in the past......

算一算，这已经是我们没在学校说话的第四天。。。
就已我看着你，你看着我来过日子。

这，算是可悲的吧。

每天望着天空，我都有一种说不出的感觉。
就像我所说的，我无法表达出我心里说有的看法。
所以
我昨天
才会一直没说话。

我现在
一直
在倒数中。。。。

还有第33天。
第4天

我哭了

2010-09-21T22:48:00.002+08:00

我。哭。了

我真的讲不出来。
我不会！
我只会哭。

所以你今天讲的话，
我。。。真的不知道我醒了吗？
我只会哭。

对于所有的事，
我只会哭。

我。哭。了

人生

2010-09-18T11:52:00.002+08:00

Photo credit: www.t.sina.com/anyixuan

“人生就像一场赌局，不可能把把都赢，但只要筹码在自己手上，就会有希望“

这句话，很有意思
我只能说，
我的筹码块用完了。

回想起昨天的所有事，
我只能说，
是我想太多。
原本就没有的事，
是自己去认为才这样的。

但是，
我还是有很多心里话还没说出来

昨天
我唯一一之标喊的一句话就是

你。不。懂

放空

2010-09-17T21:38:00.002+08:00

只能说我输了
也许是你怕了
我们的回忆没有皱折
你却用离开淌下句点

只能说我认了
你的不安得到的信任
我却得到你安慰的淘汰
-------------------------------------------
我只能说，一旦放空，是一件很痛苦的事
恩董，我知道你的感觉了

我很累
累，累，累，累
我其实很不开心
但我得假装开心
为什么？
为什么？
我累了
每天在朋友们的面前嘻嘻哈哈
但其实
我内心深处
不是这样
我累了
我不想再这样
我累了
我累了

我。累。了